Growing up, I swore I’d never end up like my dad: hooked up methamphetamine and homeless.
I remember my first year of college: I earned all A’s and B’s, without ever hearing of Adderall.
It wasn’t until I met my friend, who was majoring in premed and had all A’s.
One day, while studying, I complained to him that I couldn’t focus, and he handed me this white pill with blue specks.
He said, “just take it.”
I had never known such pure concentration.
I began asking for phentermine every time I studied with him.
I eventually went to a doctor and was prescribed Adderall.
I hate myself on it.
I sit in one place for so long, while my heart is racing and my skin is glossy from my high skin temp.
I don’t sleep all night and wake up having to fake that smile at work while my eyes are twitching.
The embarrassment and social awkwardness has made me lie and call into work.
My life is falling apart, and it turns out my dad and I are one in the same.
If I continue taking it, I will not finish school and will end up losing my job.
I don’t know what’s going to give, but something has to.
This is my first time ever coming on a help site, so I think the time is yelling out to me…