I’ve been off Adderall for over 6 weeks.
I used the drug for almost 20 years.
I started because of severe depression that could not be helped… felt I could feel better.
It did work. It worked great.
I did all my chores, went to work and stayed up as late as I wanted. It made me feel more confident, more friendly, and it let me live life again.
Well, it worked great – until it didn’t .
Increasing amounts were now getting harder and harder to get. I would lie to my doctor to get more.
Then, I started feeling depressed and started crying a lot. Not every day, but a lot.
Now, my best friend became my worst enemy.
I talked so much nobody would be able to get a word in. I was on such high gear that I did not see the truth.
I got to the point where I wanted it out of my life.
It was hard. Real hard.
I have no motivation to get up, for days.
I’m in a bubble of sad and it seems to be not going anywhere.
I weaned off gradual but at six months, I stopped it.
I’m taking supplements and any healthy thing I can get into my body.
I have days where I feel, “look, I got my whole house clean and went to work!”. And didn’t have to worry if I would be able to get a refill, in time .
That’s the part I wanted out of my life – that dependence on a Dr. to be stupid enough to write out a script.
I had quit smoking 40 years ago, and this withdrawal is far worse.
I still take my Prozac, Wellbutrin and Clonopin.
I’m not worried about those. If the time comes, I’ll get off those.
But none of those took hold of my life like Adderall.
Right now depression is hitting me hard and heavy. My fear is that it will never end.
Any encouragement would be deeply appreciated.